Friday, October 28, 2011

Fantasy Class: Cormac McCarthy

Punk everyone out the first day by calling The Road Cormac McCarthy for Dummies.  "You didn't actually think we'd read an Oprah book in here, did you?"

The Border Trilogy.  My favorite is The Crossing, but you need all three.  All the Pretty Horses might attract female students to the class, which would be a necessity.  An all-guys McCarthy class would consist of smatterings of sparse dialogue, a mysterious aroma of whiskey, a lot of whisker stroking, and everyone would smoke and look out the window for a long time.

Suttree. There's nothing like getting kicked out of your estranged son's funeral.  Well, maybe waking  crusted in your own vomit.  Many of McCarthy's characters wake to find themselves crusted in various bodily fluids.  Suggest that someone write a theme paper about it.

Blood Meridian.  Suggest someone perform an interpretive dance inspired by The Judge.  Give extra credit to the student with the largest scar.  Challenge them to cut something's head off and bring it in for show and tell.  Give vocabulary quizzes until someone cries.

No Country for Old Men.  Spend an entire month making them read Yeats' A Vision even though it's not on the course syllabus.  Whenever students complain stay very calm and unfold your pocket knife.  Pick your fingernails and ask them if they'd like to file a complaint with the department chair.  Deem at least one student "The Hunchback."

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